The Year of Saying “No”
As we bid farewell to 2023, let me embark on a journey of self-discovery and transformation, much like the tales of the great RK Narayan himself. My story begins with a revelation that has the power to change lives. It all started with a simple quote, a timeless piece of wisdom from Seneca!
In the heart of Mario Miranda’s vibrant town, I had a mentor, Godbole, who profoundly impacted my life. He was the guiding light that led me to the profound realization: “I am not a Yes man.” In a world where saying “Yes” seemed like the path of least resistance, Godbole had a different perspective. He always said “No” when his boss said “No.” It made me chuckle, but it also made me think.
I had spent most of my life saying “Yes” to everything without pausing to consider the value of my time and energy. I reflected on Seneca’s words about wasting life on pointless grief, foolish joy, and social amusements. It hit me like a thunderbolt! How much had I squandered on things that didn’t truly matter?
Saying “Yes” had its perks. It built relationships, and I was the go-to person for almost anything. However, I had overlooked something crucial — the power of “No.” I had allowed my energy and focus to scatter, all because I couldn’t turn down invitations, obligations, and the rollercoaster of emotions that life threw my way.
As I glanced back on my journey, I realized I also had accepted anger, excitement, distraction, and obsession without hesitation. I thought the other person’s perspective was proper, never daring to utter that two-letter word. “No” seemed selfish, almost taboo.
But yesterday, I experimented like a character in one of Narayan’s novels. I drew a two-by-two matrix on paper, visually representing my life choices. On the Y-axis, I marked “Things that matter” at the top and “Things that do not matter” at the bottom. On the X-axis, I boldly wrote “Saying yes” on the left and “Saying no” on the right.
With these axes, I divided my activities into four quadrants (anti-clockwise)— A, B, C, and D. Quadrant C, which I aptly named “garbage,” held a staggering 80% of my activities. Quadrant B, the sweet spot of “Saying yes” to things that truly mattered, contained a mere 10%. Astonishingly, Quadrant A, the realm of challenges, remained empty!
As we step into 2024, I’ve resolved to focus on Quadrant A, the place where challenges reside, and to embrace the power of “No.” I plan to measure my actions daily, prioritizing what truly matters. I’ll count the days this new year when I summon the courage to say “No.”
As my story unfolds, join me in this quest to make 2024 the year of saying “No.” Who knows what exciting adventures and life-changing experiences await as we step out of our comfort zones? The journey begins now, and the path ahead is full of curiosity, excitement, and endless possibilities!
